Everyone who went to see Batman this weekend can go fuck themselves.
I am so sick of people freaking out about that at the Box Office. Freak out at home, on your own time. I am being paid to serve as many of you as possible in as short a time period as possible and you freaking out does not help that goal.
-If it was sold out, there would be a sign. If there's not a sign and I don't say anything when you order, then it's not sold out.
-Don't tell me that you saw 100 people lining up to see it and therefore there are no seats. There are nearly six hundred seats in the theatre. Chilax. Seriously.
-Who the FUCK gets to the theatre 2 hours before it opens and then bitches out every employee you see because they weren't there at 7 this morning to serve your dumb ass.
-Don't yell at me for being on the phone with another customer while you were in line and therefore being slightly slower in serving you, and then take twice as long as necessary ordering and paying because you weren't ready with your money.
-Don't call the theatre and ask "it says that Batman is sold out online, is it really?" ...Yes, it really is.
-Actually, if you can answer the question yourself online (what time is it playing, where are you located, how much is it, is it really sold out, are you open, are you playing Batman, etc) please don't call the theatre. We are busy as hell with customers who are already there and your phone call makes it very hard to serve them. Also, if I ask if you can hold, don't tell me you just have a quick question. There is no such thing. If I ask if you can hold, generally I'm in the middle of serving someone else who is already at the theatre, and you can wait. They can't. If you tell me you just have a quick question, I'm really tempted to just put you on hold and leave you there until you get bored and hang up. Don't fuck with me.
-Don't ask me if I can give you any kind of discount. The price is what it is. I don't chose what to charge you. Don't ask me if that's the matinee price, as if I'll say, OOOOH, you wanted the cheaper price? My bad. There's one price for adults during the day and another one at night, but the prices are only in the computer for the relevant time. I can't charge you the nighttime price during the day and the daytime price at night. Deal with it.
-Also, if you are over 62, under 11, or in the military, you get a discount, though the last is unofficial. There is no CountryWide discount, AAA discount, diabetes discount, height, weight, or nationality discount. So don't ask. Especially if you think you're being funny. Not only are you not funny, but all the other not-funny I've had today have made the same joke. Any joke you make about the price is not only not-funny, it was not-funny the first twelve times I heard either. So can it!
-Please don't tell me "I need three." Then when I say "What movie?", please do not repeat in a loud, slow tone, as though I am stupid, "I need THREEEEE tickets!" I know that. "For what MOVIEEEEE" asshole. It is helpful if you order "Batman, three o'clock, four adults and two kids" or whatever. Also, unless your kids are under 11, they aren't kids. Your 16 year old is not a kid. They pay an adult price. I will charge you an adult price if they look over 11. So if you have kids, please order by their ages. Then I can charge you appropriately.
-THERE IS NO FUCKING STUDENT DISCOUNT!!!!!!! There hasn't been one in over a year, probably closer to two years. You didn't get one last night or yesterday or whenever, because we haven't had it for a long time. So STOP ASKING!! and stop getting mad when we don't have it. It's not our fault you're stupid and don't pay attention.
God, the idiots were out in force this weekend.